Pepper-Shaped Hole

I stand and blood leaves my head. I brace myself against the wall in front of me, my arms crossed above my head. I close my eyes. Today will be a good day. I open my eyes to see the hole in my heart on the wall in front of me. It is larger than I expected and an unusual shape, sort of the outline of a pepper with flesh missing from left side. Now I can see my entire heart – different shades of different passions color it’s surface. Each passion blends with the next so that it would be impossible to cut one love out. But here it is all the same, a hole, a void. And I know it’s name. Still, it is not hard to smile in this moment, to smile at this pain. Even this hole is a part of me. It is beautiful because it is a part of me. And, in this moment, it could not be any other way.

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